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Ilkeston Town - match off again as Town mourn Mr pigilkeston


Not surprisingly Saturdays match at Ilkeston Town has been postponed due to a frozen pitch.

Last edited by Ojiveojive, 9/Jan/2010, 7:54 am
8/Jan/2010, 9:46 am Link to this post Send Email to Tim BCFC   Send PM to Tim BCFC
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off


Thanks for the news. Not a surprise. Hoping that the Blues mach will go ahead now so I can catch both games.
8/Jan/2010, 1:25 pm Link to this post Send Email to RoJ   Send PM to RoJ
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off


 emoticon
8/Jan/2010, 1:35 pm Link to this post Send Email to darren acton   Send PM to darren acton
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off - match on - match off


Late breaking news............we have it on the authority of an unimpeachable source, a Mr pigilkeston of Derbyshire, that the game against Ilkeston is ON, YES, ON, ON, ON. No pitch inspection will be sought, no referee will be asked for an opinion of the state of the pitch as it is in the same state that it was in last Monday.

Hang on, hang on, it turns out that Mr pigilkeston is a complete numpty and is without doubt unauthorised to speak on behalf of the football club. Mr A Director said (in a northern-ish accent and without any punctuation) "this chap Mr pigilkeston is one of our more devoted supporters however he does sometimes become prone to flights of fancy and often goes out on a limb He has only the best fortunes of the club in mind and at heart but nutters like this can do an interminable amount of damage to the perceptions of people outside the football club should they actually decide to travel overnight during this bitingly cold spell we are experiencing at the present time As a club we can only apologise for the well meaning but misplaced actions of a minority of our faithful supporters who had offered to crawl on their hands and knees to breathe hot air all over the pitch with their own mouths and noses in order to thaw out the concrete like substructure hoping to facilitate having a game to watch Without doubt tomorrows game against Solihull Motors has been postponed indefinitely I say indefinitely and until further notice"

There you have it, from the horse's mouth, so to speak.

Last edited by Ojiveojive, 8/Jan/2010, 3:39 pm


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What a looooooooooong strange trip it's been
8/Jan/2010, 3:33 pm Link to this post Send Email to Ojiveojive   Send PM to Ojiveojive
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off - match on - match off


do they keep calling us solihull motors for a laugh or is it genuine
8/Jan/2010, 4:21 pm Link to this post Send Email to Psycho Mouse   Send PM to Psycho Mouse
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off - match on - match off


On the Conf North Forum, our tinpot name is Moor Green or sometimes Moor Green Motors.

Hinckley United are Stinckley United and Fleetwood Town are Fleetwood Mac or just The Mac.
8/Jan/2010, 4:28 pm Link to this post Send Email to Statto   Send PM to Statto
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off - match on - match off


quote:

Psycho Mouse wrote:

do they keep calling us solihull motors for a laugh or is it genuine



Ojive's post was just a joke anyway.

8/Jan/2010, 5:24 pm Link to this post Send Email to M00R5   Send PM to M00R5
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off - match on - match off - match back on


STOP PRESS - HOLD THE FRONT PAGES - ILKESTON SECURE THE SERVICES OF SIMON COWELL'S ARSE.

It's true, it's true.......after negotiating all day Ilkeston Town have managed to secure the services of the biggest arse in television to cover their pitch overnight. Cowell has promised to stop talking through it whilst it is on hire to Ilkeston and a local man, a Mr pigilkeston, has volunteered to hold a candle to Cowell's arse all night long in order to ensure that the game can go ahead. Thank God for the inventiveness of Ilkeston, Cowell's arse and supporters like Mr pigilkeston who are ensuring that tomorrow's game can go ahead unhindered - let's hope that Cowell doesn't contract a stomach cold or we could be back to square one. Come on you Motors.

Last edited by Ojiveojive, 8/Jan/2010, 10:05 pm


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What a looooooooooong strange trip it's been
8/Jan/2010, 10:03 pm Link to this post Send Email to Ojiveojive   Send PM to Ojiveojive
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off - match on - match off - match back on


I think there's a pitch heating dome going spare in Fleetwood which Ilkeston could borrow to get the game on.
9/Jan/2010, 3:46 am Link to this post Send Email to M00R5   Send PM to M00R5
 
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Re: Ilkeston Town - match off again as Town mourn Mr pigilkeston


Today's game against Solihull Movers has been postponed once again as a mark of respect for Town fan Mr pigilkeston who was swept away by an explosion of fecal matter whilst holding a candle to Simon Cowell's arse in order to attempt to thaw out Town's pitch. Cowell, in a breach of health and safety regulations, failed to notify Town that he had earlier in the evening consumed a dodgy shellfish vindaloo and it is surmised that the vindaloo combined with the effects of eleven pints of lager was too much for Cowell's bowels to contain, resulting in the ensuing avalanche. A spokesperson for the emergency services stated that "although local residents had called us out because of an explosion, we didn't realise that anything had happened at first, the ground had always looked like that, it was only when Mrs pigilkeston turned up with a flask of coffee for her husband that we realised that we had a major incident all over our hands."

Club spokesman Mr B Director said "It is a sad day for the town and we shall be looking to obtain compensation through the courts for this fiasco. Cowell knew he'd eaten a vindaloo but he failed to warn us resulting in the death of one of our most fervently loved supporters. Our condolences go out to Mrs pigilkeston and the pigilkeston piglets. We can't even consider a new date for our game against Solihull at the moment, when something like this happens it brings home to you how more important life and death is than football, despite what Bill Shankly thinks. It's just so shitty." At that Mr B Director held a hankerchief up to his face, not to wipe away the tears but to cover his mouth and nose.

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What a looooooooooong strange trip it's been
9/Jan/2010, 8:17 am Link to this post Send Email to Ojiveojive   Send PM to Ojiveojive
 


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